“To Thine Own Self Be True…” but Who Am I?

A few years ago I realized that I didn’t really know who I was… and found myself face-to-face with a question that every Mormon (and most others) faces at some point in life: Who am I?This wasn’t some cute little exercise in existential goalmaking, a short list of the qualities I wanted to assume to become the eventual perfect spouse, or a transcript of the gifts outlined in my Patriarchal blessing… and there wasn’t anything pleasant about the proc Continue reading “To Thine Own Self Be True…” but Who Am I?

A Spark.

A Spark.Is it fake? A fantasy? A surrealization of what cannot be? Or is it real, and miracles do happen?My heart is light, my eyes are bright, I woke up smiling while I slept last night. Can it be, that a girl can be the focus of my mind?I see her lips, the way she laughs, the passion shining in her eyes; her voice surrounds me as it echoes in the dark.And this morning, I give th Continue reading A Spark.

Too Busy For a Wife?

I was talking with a group of guys earlier this week and the conversation turned to wives, girlfriends, and football. It all seemed like banter until one guy said, “You know what the problem is, Mormon Guy? You’re too busy for a wife. And you don’t need one.” He went on to outline the reasons why I was too busy, and then detailed all the external factors that stood in the way of girls who might be interested – the thing Continue reading Too Busy For a Wife?

Looking Forward to The Day When…

…everything will work out.I’ve had a bunch of conversations recently where, out of the blue, the conversation turns south… and people make jokes and crude references to being gay. I really have never gotten the humor, but that’s probably because they aren’t really funny to someone who’s been there. Sometimes I think it’s ironic that the only people who make crude sexual jokes have no idea how their jokes impact people around them… or the real meaning of the words that roll so Continue reading Looking Forward to The Day When…

Gay, Mormon, Faithful, Myself: I Choose Who I Am

There’s a seeming dichotomy that exists in the world of homosexuality… that of choice.Some people honestly believe that the feelings and attractions of homosexuality are a choice… that gay men could easily choose not to be attracted to other men, and that those who “struggle” with homosexuality are in reality simply struggling with their faith. Under this model, even feeling attractions to other men is a sin. A sin that, if left unattended and unquashed, is worthy of damnation. And a Continue reading Gay, Mormon, Faithful, Myself: I Choose Who I Am


I’m not a hugely artistic person when it comes to the visual arts. I have a hard time drawing stick figures. I’m aware, though, that pictures have a huge impact, especially with blogs, and I think it’s ironic that I never use pictures…I got an email the other day, letting me know about a site called the Helaman Gallery. The creator focuses on photography of LDS temples and makes the electronic proofs available for free on his website – Pi Continue reading Pictures.

Inspirational Fire

I had a conversation with a friend this week. Someone else had mentioned that he needed help… and didn’t want to be part of the Church anymore… and that’s my cue to drop everything. I called him as soon as I could, then called his roommates when he didn’t wake up, and then we just spent the rest of the day talking.It’s always an amazing experience for me to see where someone lacks in faith, and to be able to be there Continue reading Inspirational Fire